September 15th, 2003
University of South Carolina - Columbia, South Carolina
WE IN MY HOMETOWN TONIGHT BABY.
World Heavyweight Champion: Triple H (since 12/15/02)
Intercontinental Champion: Christian (since 8/10/03)
World Tag Team Champions: La Resistance (since 6/15/03)
WWE Women's Champion: Molly Holly (since 7/28/03)
TONIGHT: Last Man Standing Contract Signing between Kane & Shane McMahon
Chris Jericho and Christian are in the ring on strike to start the show after pyro and shit. They have signs that say “fire Steve Austin” and “Austin is unfair.” They bitch about Austin assaulting Jericho last week. Austin comes out and the crowd goes nuts per usual. He says he only attacked Jericho because he disrespected him and right now they’re holding up the show and they need an asswhooping again. Austin can’t touch them if he isn’t physically provoked and he tries to get them to punch him, but neither will. Austin says Christian will have an IC Title defense at Unforgiven. Jericho wants that title shot, but Austin says he can only have it if he wins the next match.
1) Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Jericho - #1 Contender’s Match for the IC Title
Christian tries to attack Van Dam, but gets kicked down. Van Dam then dives onto both Jericho & Christian to send us to commercial. Good shit. This match rocks while it lasts. Christian runs down and cracks them both with the title and causes a Double DQ so Austin makes the match at Unforgiven a triple threat for the title. BY GOD. This was a fun ass sprint tho.
Match rating - **1/2
We are seeing Goldberg highlights throughout the night apparently. They show a WCW Nitro one after this match.
2) Spike Dudley (w/ Bubba Ray & D-Von) vs. Rob Conway (w/ La Resistance)
Spike is in a neck brace after that infamous incident from last week where Spike got thrown over the top rope and La Resistance missed the table. The Dudleys and La Resistance brawl through the crowd as the match gets started. Conway makes quick work of him and then gets a table and brings it in the ring. These two trios battle in a tables match at Unforgiven. Conway powerbombs Spike through the table and doesn’t miss! Good job, buddy. The Dudleyz run back in from the crowd, but they’re too late. Great moment here where Bubba is checking on Spike and yells “IM SORRY SPIKE, DAMMIT!”
Backstage, Al Snow & Coach tell Bischoff they won’t let him down at Unforgiven against JR & King. They apparently have something planned for them later tonight. Bischoff has to go attend the Kane/Shane contract signing, but he’s handed a note that says there’s two half naked women waiting for him in his office…
Back from commercial, Bischoff walks into his office and it’s… Mae Young and Moolah hahahaha. It’s Moolah’s birthday and she wants a match in her hometown. Bischoff says “well happy damn birthday and who the hell sent you here?” Stone Cold walks up and tells Eric to give her a kiss. He refuses so Mae Young gives him one, lmao.
3) Victoria vs. The Fabulous Moolah (w/ Mae Young)
Victoria gets distracted by Mae Young on the apron and Moolah rolls her up only a few seconds in. Victoria snaps after the bell and lays rights on Moolah. Randy Orton comes out to stop it? He says Moolah is a legend and he heard many stories about her from his dad and granddad. Orton says it’s her 80th birthday and she doesn’t deserve this. He introduces himself to her as Randy Orton… Legend Killer. RKO TO MOOLAH HOLY FUCKKKKK. Epic moment.
Next Goldberg moment is from Road Wild ‘98 when he slammed The Giant.
4) Goldust & Lance Storm vs. Rodney Mack & Mark Henry (w/ Theodore Long)
Rodney Mack & Lance begin. Henry strikes Storm from the apron. Goldust gets in and Henry finishes him with the World’s Strongest Slam.
Match rating - *1/4
In the hall, Flair & H congratulate Orton on RKO’ing Moolah. They’re headed to get ready for Goldberg’s going away party. Orton says he has to take care of some stuff first. As he walks off, he runs into Maven and they staredown. Then he runs into his opponent for Sunday, Shawn Michaels. Orton says he’s gonna use him as a stepping stone on Sunday. HBK slaps the shit out of him and says if he’s gonna use him as a stepping stone.. he better step hard.
Outside of the arena, Rosey calls a cab for himself.. the S.H.I.T. (Super hero in training) meanwhile, Terri prances out to interview Molly Holly and Gail Kim. Molly says she & Gail have a handicap match with Trish later tonight.
It’s time for the contract signing between Shane McMahon and Kane now. Bischoff is out first with Kane. Shane comes out and it ain’t long before it all breaks down as we expect. Chair shots to Kane and Shane starts cleaning off the announce table. He lines Kane up and climbs to the top turnbuckle for a god damnFLYING WLBOW THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE ON KANE. Awesome spot. JR sells that it’s gonna take that and more to keep Kane down for 10 at Unforgiven. As Shane is walking off, Kane sits up and stands back in the ring and stares Shane down. Gooood shit. Shane looks flabbergasted.
Goldberg moment #3 for the night is from Backlash last April where he defeated The Rock.
5) Trish Stratus vs. Gail Kim & Molly Holly
This happens and Trish is great fighting from underneath so it’s awesome. It leads to something even more awesome in the form of the return of Lita who makes the save for Trish and the place goes fucking nuts. I wish I would’ve been there to experience this.
Jonathan Coachman and Al Snow come out next dressed as JR and Jerry Lawler. Jim Ross utters the amazing words…
“There’s two wild asses for you.”
Before going on a tangent about beating their ass on Sunday at Unforgiven. Coach & Snow pick up the headset from the Spanish announce table and someone in the back cuts off JR & King’s mics. Coach & Snow say they’re gonna give everyone a preview of what it’s gonna be like when they take JR & King’s jobs after Sunday.
6) Test (w/ Stacy Keibler) vs. Val Venis
Test verbally abuses Stacy and makes her sit in a chair at ringside. This goes maybe 2 minutes and Val wins.
After the match, Jerry Lawler storms down and challenges Al Snow to a match. Coach joins JR up at the original commentary booth.
7) Jerry Lawler vs. Al Snow
This is what it is. It’s only a minute or two and Lawler gets the win while JR & Coach are bickering on commentary which was admittedly hilarious. JR says he can’t wrestle BUT HES GONNA FIGHT ON SUNDAY.
The show closes with World Heavyweight Champion Triple H coming to the ring for a celebration for Goldberg. CELEBRATION. Celebrating the end of Goldberg's career that he professes will come this Sunday at Unforgiven. H has a big portrait in the ring of Evolution holding up Golberg's bloody carcass last week and says we have seen the end of Goldberg. This brings out the man himself and he press slams H and H fleas from the ring. BUT THERE AIN'T NO RUNNING ON SUNDAY KING!!!
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